What John Found in Solitude

My mom works with juvinille felons. She loves her work although it's tough. She also learns a lot about life and human nature as she interacts with folks on the other side of the fence (barbedwire fence that is).

Recently while in a prison she told me of a conversation that she had with a man named John. John was imprisoned for theft. After attempting a priosn break he was removed from general population of the prison and placed into solitary confinement. John's life was confined to isolation in one cramped cell for 23 hours a day every day. Apparently during this time in confinement he did some soul searching.

One day he confessed to my mom, "While in solitary confinement everyday, all day, the thought finally occurred to me that the mess I'm in may not be everyone elses fault. It might actually be my own fault."

"That's an important realization", mom replied, wanting to affirm the fact that he was owning up to his wrong doing.

"So, how long in solitary did it take you to realize this", mom naturally inquired.

John looked at her with a blank stare and replied, "I guess that thought occurred to me somewhere in my fourth year of solitary confinement."

Think about that for a moment. It took a grown man sitting alone for 23 hours a day, for 1460 days. . .that's 33,580 hours of wall-to-wall aloneness to finally begin to own up to the evil within!

Now, I'm not here to judge. Are any of our hearts any different? Without the grace of God, none of us are capable of owning up to any of our junk.

The deeper truth that I took from my conversation with mom is a reminder of the deceptive nature of the human soul. Even when we are alone, we want to look any place. . .at brick and mortor. . .at a flies buzzing around. . .at the bars we're held captive by. . .any place and every place but within. Eventually, John either had no place else to look or God used the alone time to force him to look at himself. Probably it was both. All I know is that somewhere in his fourth year of exile his eyes opened in a new and fresh way and his soul followed suit.

Looking deep within. Owning our junk. Viewing our old lives in a new way. This is what John found in solitude.

Discipleship at a Turtle's Pace

As the pastor of discipleship at Hayward Wesleyan, I am mindful at how painfully slow people's pilgrimages to the cross are! It seems that we are a people who are perpetually in a hurry. Yet the one destination that cannot be rushed, manipulated or short-cutted is the cross. People must take up their own cross in their own time. There are no programs, curriculum, sermon series, or other well-intended ideas that can do it for people. Perhaps the fact that there are no quick-fixes to become like Christ is what makes the journey so undesirable to so many. Whatever the case, I know one thing. . . what we have been given from God, we MUST offer to others! As disciplers we cannot force anyone to become like Jesus. But, you can take up your own cross and encourage those in your sphere of influence to take up theirs too. You can call people to the journey, and offer them pathways towards transformation. You can let your light shine, and invite others to let their lights shine too.

Yes, discipleship is a painfully slow process, and often pretty messy too. It was no different for Jesus as he invested in the twelve. Yet, it's out of this slow, messy process that sons and daughter of God are born and real transformation in Christlikeness becomes possible. So, I invite you to reevaluate the progression of discipleship in terms of decades instead of days. Think about that person whom you've invested in. Where are they today compared to ten years ago? The simple reality is that discipleship is a slow, life-long process. Sometimes it feels too slow. Eugene Peterson dubbs discipleship "a long obedience in the same direction". It's putting one step in front of another day in and day out.

It's like a turtle's pace. Is that discouraging? For me it often is. But, I'm reminded that there is no other way to do it than Jesus way. Believe me, I've tried short-cuts. They don't work. We'll have to trust that the path He laid out, albiet slow, is the only one worth walking.

In the event of discouragement remember the tortoise and the hare. Moral of the story? The slow and steady pace wins the race.